Just Waiting...

Well, here we are again... 40+ weeks and we have a bean that is still baking rather than gracing the world with an appearance.

I think that one of the most ironic things about pregnancy for me is that I go over my "estimated due date" every time, and am always "late".

Why is this ironic? Well, I am a chronically early person; someone who is always on time/punctual, and cringes (maybe even panics?) at that thought of inconveniencing someone by not being on time, (I get that from my mother). So these children, waiting for weeks after we are "ready" for them, is just... well, ironic.

I love being on time, keeping a schedule, and having things in order. My children on the other hand, have taken their view on timeliness from their father... My Darling Husband, whom I love dearly mind you, is never on time. He is always punctual for work, and for meetings, but when it comes to family commitments or dining with friends, or parties, he is ALWAYS late. It drives me insane. I know his schedule is crazy, and changes by the minute, but it still doesn't make me feel better when we arrive late to events.

While I know that our pregnancy due dates, even when we know conception, are estimates, and I know that the bean needs to cook as long as it wants/needs, it would still be nice to (for once) not see my due date come and go with "no end in sight" (although there is an end somewhat in sight, and I know that no one has ever been pregnant forever).

I am enjoying these last few weeks/days/hours of pregnancy, waiting on pins and needles to meet and hold our new bean, to see her take her first breath, cry for the first time, and to hold her on the outside. I am loving feeling these kicks and movements, and although I have been complaining, even the pain is a blessing in some ways.

One of the recurring themes at my blessing way was acceptance and patience. I know that I am 'right where I am supposed to be', and that the longer the wait, the more sweet the reward will be. I really don't mind that I go longer than a lot of women, and I don't mind waiting until the bean is ready on her own. This will be the last time I get to experience this and I am embracing that.

It just is ironic that the mom who is as punctual and timly as I am, has children who run on their father's schedule (or lack there of), starting from birth. I wonder what I am in for as they grow older?